I was going to title this post “Seven Genres I’ll Never Write”, but I decided that was unnecessarily rash. For one thing, I’ve been known to tackle a particular genre that feels alien just for the challenge of it. Also, I really don’t know how my tastes, or the market, will change. I don’t normally tend to be much influenced by the current trends or the latest hot selling themes, but it’s always possible that I’ll have a killer idea I just can’t resist.
So here’s a list of the genres I haven’t tried yet. I won’t try to predict the future.
As I noted in an earlier Saturday Seven post, I’m almost completely uninterested in any sort of team or organized sports. The closest I’ve come to a “sports” story was Crossed Hearts, a MM tale set at a competitive Scrabble tournament.
For some readers, and authors, cowboys have an enduring appeal, but they generally leave me cold. I’m a born-and-bred Easterner, for one thing. I’ve traveled through the American West, but I don’t know it well and actually don’t feel that comfortable in those dusty, arid, wide open spaces.
Then there’s the smell. Whenever I try to imagine a sexy cowboy, I start thinking about what he’d smell like after riding a horse all day, or rounding up the cattle, or mucking out the barns... The question of olfactory stimuli becomes particularly off-putting when I think about historical Western tales. Back in the days of the Wild West, baths were at best a monthly activity!
Vampires, yes. Shifters, sure. Ghosts, tentacled monsters, even Big Foot might make their way into one of my stories. But zombies? As characters? I’ve written a bit of erotic horror, but I can’t imagine how I could make zombies appealing. Again, decomposing bodies are going to reek, and bad smells put me in a very bad mood.
I guess I could imagine writing a scifi romance set in the context of a zombie apocalypse, though that’s been done so often I think I’d be bored. I will say that I’d be deeply impressed by an author who managed to create a sympathetic, non-disgusting zombie protagonist.
Secret baby romance
I’ve never written a pregnant heroine, let alone a classic (dare I use that term?) secret baby romance. This is partly due to the fact that I personally don’t have children (other than my fur babies) and have never been pregnant. I came of age after the advent of the Pill, so I’ve always had control of my fertility. I think the whole topic is less central for me than for many women.
I certainly can imagine writing a story where the conflict involved pregnancy, but I haven’t done so yet.
In fact, as far as I can recall, only two of my many heroines have children, Ruby Jones in Wild About That Thing, and Beatrice, the Victorian woman with the secret life in my novel Miranda’s Masks.
I love historical fiction. I love to read it, and I’d love to write more of it than I do—though to be honest I’m sometimes too lazy to do the research this would require. Still, I’ve written a few historical tales, set in the Middle Ages, in Elizabethan times, in the Victorian period and in the Gilded Age at the turn of the twentieth century. Somehow, though, I’ve never had the slightest inclination to write a Regency story, despite their popularity.
One factor is my unfamiliarity with the period. However, I have to say that in general, I have not found the Regencies I’ve read to be all that interesting. I guess I prefer ordinary, everyday people to the dukes and earls that seem to populate this sub-genre.
This is another really popular sub-genre that doesn’t ring my bell at all. I grew up during the Vietnam war, and I’m certain that colored my view of the armed forces. Everyone I knew would do anything they could to avoid military service.
In case you’re not familiar with the term, futanari refers to individuals who have the sexual characteristics of both genders. There’s a popular niche genre for erotica and erotic romance featuring such characters. Sally Bend’s Bending the Bookshelf blog reviews many of them.
I’ve never read any of this genre, let alone written any. However, I’ll be frank; I’m tempted, if only because I really like mixing things up in my stories.
So—let me ask you, my readers: are there any of these genres that you’d like to see me try? Leave me a comment with your thoughts. I’ll randomly draw the name of one reader who’ll receive his or her choice of Crossed Hearts or Wild About That Thing.
By the way, be sure to visit the other authors who have Saturday Seven posts today. You’ll find the full list of links at Long andShort Reviews.