Wednesday, September 7, 2011

BDSM Stories and Humor

By Cari Silverwood (Guest Blogger)

Otherwise known as:

Whoops, I think the dog’s on the front porch gnawing on the butt plug. And Mrs. Whittacker’s come to visit. And now she’s playing tug-o-war with Rover. No, it’s not the weeny pink one, it’s the big black rhino-size butt plug. That vibrates.

I’m writing this because I had a reviewer recently say to me that although she enjoyed my story, she liked my bio even more. Her husband is a Star Wars aficionado (yes, I like that word because it’s sophisticated and French though I always have to get out my dictionary to spell it), also known as a Star Wars geek. The end of my Bio:

And, dammit, I can’t seem to stop reading other erotica authors either. I have come over to the dark side. Someone please find me a candle...and some rope. 'Cause if Darth Vader's here, I'm going to see if he's up for some bondage and wax play.

After she showed it to him, he said, “That is SO wrong,” then walked away with an amused smirk on his face. When she told me I should consider writing humor I automatically thought she meant erotica plus humor, she didn’t but it set the ball rolling in my head. I have a lot of space up here so it’s still rolling.

In real life funny stuff happens. A friend was merrily paddling his wife’s behind when their cat walked up, gave him the evil eye, and bit him on the leg. Another couple had the cat leap on the husband’s dangly bits while they were doing it doggy style. Perhaps understandable -- he should have been doing it pussy cat style. Vibrators have been known to be used as pretend torches by the kids in front of the relatives.

Seriously, adding humor to any story tends to round out the people and make them more real -- always a good result. How many real people never laugh? Sure humor’s not likely in the middle of an action scene where the villain is being shot or the world is being saved but elsewhere I think it can be wonderful. The point here being that BDSM scenes are akin to action scenes and throwing in humor knocks everything out of focus.

There’s a whole swathe of humor out there covering things the submissive could say or do to the Dom -- like putting super glue on the handle of the flogger. J

But if the submissive says something smart-ass to the Dom or does something silly and you still want sex in there soon, the Dom is rather likely to do something creatively evil and sex-orientated. Does this make the humor die a premature death? Perhaps. I’m not sure myself and may have to try writing it in to be certain.

Right now though, when I write D/s scenes I like there to be tension and conflict. Throwing humor into the mix seems to spoil the whole vibe. I love making the woman unsure of what’s going down (no naughty pun intended). I love doing a bit of a mind fuck. But then I’m an evil author.

If I put humor into a story, I think for these reasons, I’m far more likely to use it outside the sex scenes and the BDSM scenes but since that’s still a large part of a story, there should be plenty of opportunity. So I’m marking this idea down as a plot bunny for the future. Soon I shall need a rabbit hutch up here. There’re a lot of bunnies bouncing around in my head, along with that big rolling ball.

So anyway - speaking of BDSM - here's a definitely non-humorous excerpt from my book Iron Dominance. Oh, and I'm giving away a copy of the book to one lucky person who leaves a comment!

Stay there,” he said.

She could smell him.

She almost opened her eyes to say something, but instead balanced there. Why she obeyed him, she wasn’t sure but it satisfied something primal, something deeply sexual. And letting go like this, made her feel safe.

Anticipation strung her insides tight. She yearned for further caresses. Her cleft swelled.

“Here. Raise your feet.” An article of clothing, both silken cloth and something harder, slid with muffled clicks up each leg. Theo arranged it about her torso, cool beads shifting across her breasts until the garment fitted snugly on her body. Something narrow settled between her legs. She gasped at a throb of pleasure as his fingers played in her moisture. A few more adjustments and he led her off to one side. A light flared on. “There. Open your eyes.”

In a tall mirror, she saw herself, dressed in a black corset paneled with satin. Coming down from a halter, pearl ropes fanned out over each breast with her nipples peeking out between. A tiny skirt of chiffon, divided at the crotch, barely made it as far as her upper thighs. Lines of seed pearls undulated down the satin and a string of larger pearls dove deeply between her legs, emphasizing the split lips of her sex. She could feel it run up between the cheeks of her bottom at the back. Even as she looked, she felt a renewed throb, for every movement she made, from breath to heartbeat to shift of feet, moved the line of pearls and rubbed against her clit.

In the reflection, she saw Theo beyond her shoulder, bare-chested, the ringlets of his black hair stark against his forehead. He raised a satin and pearl choker and positioned it about her neck, clicking it into place. “And these,” he said, holding first one wrist and then the other to snick matching black satin bracelets on her wrists. “They suit you.” From the hardness, metal lurked beneath the black cloth.

Where the choker and bracelets rested on skin, her pulse rose, thumping, to the surface and reminded her of where she was, who she was with, and especially, how dangerous this could be. But…she trusted him.

To her surprise, her throat still worked, though the words seemed to stick to her tongue. “How did you know my size? Where did this come from?”

“Bought while I was away. I have a good memory, especially for someone as striking as you.”

Which meant, he’d planned her…seduction, while she’d been planning escape. She leaned back against him, fascinated by the allure of the woman in the mirror. The heat from his body soaked into her like a glass of wine. She lifted each wrist and examined the bracelets -- identical, and each with tiny loops of steel projecting from them.

“That’s for a chain to pass through,” he whispered, mouthing the nape of her neck. “Does it bother you? Think, before you answer.”

“Yes…” she said slowly, fearful of being again restrained in cuffs.

“And yet?” He pressed a hand against her stomach, holding her against him, making her feel the rigid line of his cock. The pearls slid in her juices, pressing, rolling over her clit and anus. She let out a whimper. “Ahh. You feel them working on you.” He chuckled. “And yet?”

And yet the idea of it, of being restrained by Theo, held a strange and deadly fascination. She shied away from that thought, and shook her head. “And nothing.”

“Ah-h. I can see my first project will be to get you talking more.”

She stood there in silence. The fear she felt came intertwined with lust in almost everything that Theo did to her. Taking her by the shoulders, he moved her to face him, gray eyes inches away, then his mouth descended, covering hers, devouring her. She breathed in his breath, letting him do as he willed. One broad hand held the base of her neck, the other splayed over the curve of her buttocks. His fingers wrapped around the pearl rope running between her legs, tightening it. Desire ran rampant through her, surging higher with every tiny movement of his lips on hers, and the rub of the pearls on her pussy and nipples.

When she put her hands to the belt of his pants, he reached between their bodies, snared both her wrists and pulled them round to the small of her back where he held them with one hand. Again, the pearls shifted. She bit her lip, a moan escaping her as she arched.

Eyes shut, she heard a soft animal-like growl.

“Claire, if you’re not damn careful, I’ll eat you up.”

What? She opened her eyes a slit, still panting, to see that he’d stepped away a little, angling his stance so as to observe her.

His gaze brushed her, lingering on her breasts before he locked on her eyes. “Last chance. Do you want to stop? Are you too sore? It might cause me irreparable harm, but I can stop.” Then he eyed her darkly, as if he’d liked to do exactly what he’d threatened to -- eat her up.

The pain of the bruise at her neck had faded to nothing in spite of the choker. With her whole being, she yearned for more of him. He inflamed her past bearing and knowing that he watched her, swept her excitement to another level.

She licked her lips, aware of her wrists still caught behind her and the display of her body. God, if he didn’t do more than this, she’d surely burst.

“No,” she said huskily. “Don’t stop.”

“Please?”

Ah, how he tormented her. “Please.”

“Over here then.” Still gripping her wrists he urged her toward the bed, to kneel by the side of it, and lie face down across the quilt with her bottom up. He spread her hands, palm down over each cheek of her buttocks.

“Don’t move,” he whispered in her ear. “And I won’t have to tie you.”

Tie me? She almost let go at that. Was this what she wanted? But he held his hands over hers a moment. She stayed there.

“Good.”

His fingers trailed over the backs of her hands, over the ends of her fingernails, and down her thighs. She quivered, sucking in air through the quilt bunched beneath her mouth.

“Spread your legs, Claire.”

She shifted them, feeling even more exposed, a breeze caressing her engorged labia. He traced down the line of pearls, reached her wet cleft and followed deeper where the pearls seemed to have sunk into her flesh. Slick and wet. The scent of her lust reached her. Slowly he went farther until he reached her clit. He circled it, teasing, making her shift her bottom to place the finger just right.

About Me: Though I’d much rather stay invisible and spin you all tales with my words, here’s a little snippet of my world.

I have a lovely family, with the prerequisite teenager who dwells in the dark bedroom catacombs…a husband who raises eyebrows when he catches glimpses of what I write, and a furry menagerie of other animals barking meowing, and swimming about the place.

Before writing the novel Three Days of Dominance, I had never dipped my little toes in the hot and lust-swirled sea of erotica. Now every time I turn around there’s someone begging me to write down their story in the most lurid way. I’m sure I don’t where my people learnt their morals. They’re quite adamant about teaching me creative new ways of making love. So I doubt I’ll run out of ideas anytime soon.

And, dammit, I can’t seem to stop reading other erotica authors either. I have come over to the dark side. Someone please find me a candle...and some rope. 'Cause if Darth Vader's here, I'm going to see if he's up for some bondage and wax play.

My website, if you’re curious about my other evil pursuits: http://www.carisilverwood.net/

32 comments:

Dawn said...

I LOVE humor, family ties (not incest but family dynamics and even children) and everyday normal stuff in BDSM romances, it's nice to see everyday "normal" people who love all things BDSM in their private lives. What I'm trying to say is I like to know people like me enjoy BDSM and just because someone is into BDSM it doesn't mean they are the stereotypical freaks or weirdos...BDSM has such a bad reputation, ya know??

Bianca Sommerland said...

I can't do humor, but I love how you do it, Cari! Your stories are so rich-full of life, love, laughter, tears...

I'll make you a deal. I'll lend you some of my darkness if you lend me some of your humor ;)

Hugs,
Bianca

Anonymous said...

Enjoyed your comment about Darth Vader. I love humor, and sometimes it can bring the tension down a little especially when your with a loved one.
Excerpt was great.
Thanks
Patricia
panthers.ravens@yahoo.com

Samantha said...

I think that the same reason that you write BDSM books is the reason I love to read them.

kiss417@hotmail.com

SusanR said...

WOW - great excerpt!!
Thanks for the contest.

susanmik AT gmail DOT com

Paws said...

Yes please?!
I love humor in anything.

Cari Silverwood said...

Hi there :) Thanks for all your comments. Humor does make the world go round, I think...along with love. Can't do without the love.

lorene said...

humor is good. Look fwd to reading this.

Lisabet Sarai said...

Hello, Cari,

Welcome back! I see you've brought your fans!

I'm in awe of authors who can be funny, especially without killing the mood. About the only sort of humor I'm capable of seems to be parody.

Thanks again for joining us at Beyond Romance.

Maggie Nash said...

Hey Cari!
I have to agree with Naughty D. It's great to see some normality associated with BDSM, but like you I also think it should be outside of the scenes. The mind fuck is the best kind isn't it? Although there could be some evil humor LOL
And you do have a great voice for humor

Maggie

vicky42000 said...

I love sex mixed with humor. If you can't laugh while trying to do some crazy positions or other things that someone thought up...you should just give up! I love your writing! It is very intense and erotic. Can't wait to read the entire book!
Vicky

Unknown said...

Love the excerpt! Definitely piqued my interest.

gabriellebisset@gmail.com

L. K. Below/Lindsay Below said...

I love a good humorous book. Humor can be so hard to write well, so I always have respect for the authors who pull it off. Humor in BDSM? I'd read that!

lbelow(at)lbelow.net

Anonymous said...

OMG - I love your post Cari! You definitely made me laugh a few times here...the neighbor playing tug of war (LOL).
Can't wait for that book (including humor) - in the meantime, I'll be checking out your current books.
Thanks for starting my day with a smile. I'd love to be included in this drawing (unless I'm too late)
kaydeeroyal at msn dot com

Harlie Williams said...

Great post and the excerpt, well...wow! I think humor can work in BDSM but only afterwards. The cover is beautiful, too.

Thanks for the contest.

Oh, and I'll take Han Solo, the rope and the candle, please. Thanks.

maw1725@gmail.com

P.L. Parker said...

I love humor in a story - even in the intense scenes. Probably because no matter what, I always find something funny about most everything.

Nina Pierce said...

I love humor in stories. If used well, it eases the tension without breaking the flow. LOVED the excerpt.

nina(AT)ninapierce(DOT)com

Anonymous said...

Humor is necessary to create a well rounded character and story. I personally love to see humor in stories no matter how serious the plot, sometimes you need the break.

gillian at blackdoorpress dot com

Shadow said...

Great post! I love humor in a story. It lightens the tension, makes the characters seem for real. And i love to laugh. :) I read one story before where a couple were getting hot and heavy, the woman fell of the bed, the guy tripped and smack his head. It was to funny! lol
shadowluvs2read(at)aol(dot)com

Anonymous said...

I incorporate humor almost everywhere I can. I recently wrote what I hope is a very funny and erotic short story that includes light BDSM. Most of the humor in the story leads up to the sex but I tried to keep with the theme and add some levity into that scene as well.

Love the excerpt!

Anonymous said...

I think humor belongs everywhere - at times. There will be moments during sex and BDSM scenes where it's intended to be serious and others where some lighthearted humor is perfect. I was watching a friend doing a suspension on her boy and she got the measures wrong, so when she hoisted him up, he ended up being able to touch his head to the ground. We all started laughing. It took nothong away from the scene and when it was time to get serious - they did. Humor is part of life as is sex as is humor during sex/scenes. I agree, I like normality in the stories. We aren't freaks, despite our proclivities. Sorry for the novel, here :)
clancym13@gmail.com

Heather said...

LMAO, I love this post. I love my kinky, rough, hot sex and I love my humorous stories but I have never had them put in the same book like that so I'm really looking forward to reading your stuff. Definitely count me in this contest ;)
chamblinh@gmail.com

Tonya Kinzer said...

Hi Cari! Your sense of humor is wonderful and since I love the Dom/sub, soft bondage and BDSM erotica, I can't wait to read your book! Those topics appeal to readers because first, they are taboo and people love to read what shouldn't be written. Better yet is the internal ecstasy the reader gets while they read those forbidden words that create even more forbidden thoughts! Thanks for the inspiration, I'm off to write! LOL

orelukjp0 said...

I also enjoy humor in stories. A little bit if twisted humor goes a long way. As you stated, a zinger of a remark can lead to all kinds of sarcastic comments and punishments following the remark. Then too, slapstick humor also works. Bodies falling, ropes slipping, fluctuation. If u know where I am going.
I would love to read a copy of Dominance.

desitheblonde said...

i can say wow i like the cover of the book in black and white you had to put some thought in to the books the idea of the stuff is great and would love to read and i would not be ashamed to do the blogging on all the site i am on and will tell my twitter and my face book fans

Naomi Bellina said...

Pearls! I loved the pearls! I just had some photos taken the other day and was given pearls to wear. It was oddly erotic, and now I know why. Tasty excerpt.

Cari Silverwood said...

Oh, here I am coming back late and I find all these nice comments. This book was a delight to write. As I said above, it's not aimed so much at the humorous side but...if you read it watch out for Dankyo, he does get some good lines:)

Lisabet Sarai said...

Cari! You've done a great job getting everyone excited...!!

Readers, Cari will announce her winner tomorrow, Saturday, morning.

Jan Irving said...

This was a great post. I'd never read your books, Cari, but now I want to pick them up.

Jan

Susan Kohler said...

I love putting humor onto BDSM and erotic romance. The excerpt really got to me.

I write spanking stories, not much BDSM added to it at all, but I do try to let the characters have a life outside of their play.

John Leavitt said...

Sexy, steampunky fun. What's not to like!

Cari Silverwood said...

The winner of my book is Harlie Reader.
Thank you all for stopping by and your insightful comments :)

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