By Michelle Davis (Guest Blogger)
[October 2018]
October
is birthday month in my family. My oldest son celebrated his special
day on the 18th, and my husband and younger son shared a birthday on
the 28th. I’m the outlier… my birthday isn’t until February,
and I will be turning 55 this upcoming year. Just typing those two
numerals startles me a bit. To be honest, I’ve always been
challenged by the “5’s” in the “birthday world.” Turning
thirty, forty, or even fifty didn’t bother me. But I did have
trouble with twenty-five, thirty- five, and forty-five. I think that
I would always anticipate the next decade at the mid-way point, so in
a way, I’d be thinking I was actually older than I was!
However,
when I dealt with cancer seven years ago, I made a promise to myself
that I’d never complain about getting older… because I certainly
didn’t like the alternative! So, I will do
my best not to allow
fifty-five to ruffle my feathers. I will try to embrace this next
milestone instead of becoming a grouchy, sullen or cranky middle-aged
woman who commiserates about getting older.
Last
week, while having dinner with another couple, an innocent comment
sparked a fabulous “aha” moment. During our conversation, our
friend mentioned that he found an older woman extremely sexy. I guess
that’s not an abnormal comment, but I usually don’t associate
aging females with the term, “sexy.” That’s when it hit me…
wouldn’t sexy at sixty be pretty amazing?
Before
you start to judge or make assumptions, I’m not talking about how
most people describe “sexy.” This is not about being a voluptuous
temptress or a seductive siren. No, what I’m talking about is quite
different. My definition involves something few women possess in
their younger years. What I desire to be in five years is totally
different. The image that intrigues me does not rest on pure physical
appearance, body type, or bedroom eyes. My sexy at sixty exudes three
elements… self-confidence, wisdom, and grace.
Self-confidence
is a rare gift almost never seen in young women. I’ve only known
several females in their twenties or thirties who were blessed with
the innate knowledge of their true self-value. These individuals
didn’t compare or judge others because they were completely
comfortable with themselves. But as we all know, most women don’t
fall under that category. It takes us time to know who we are so that
we can learn to like, accept, and perhaps even love ourselves. That’s
when the self-confidence kicks in.
Wisdom
also defines my version of sexy. A wise woman doesn’t blurt out the
right response to prove that she’s smart. No. Instead, women with
wisdom know.
While they might or might not have the correct answer, they
understand, something much greater. Wisdom isn’t knowledge of a
content area or a specific philosophy. Rather, it is a generalized
comprehension of how the world functions and how we, as individual
beings, interact. That’s why I want to be wise!
And,
grace… I think it may be my new favorite word. When I was younger,
I wanted to be faster, the first to accomplish something, or the best
at what I did. Now, I wish for gracefulness in all things. I hope to
flow in my yoga practice. I want to efficiently glide when I run.
And, I wish to demonstrate kindness, patience, and compassion during
my interactions with others. While grace certainly won’t win me any
medals or offer accolades for outstanding accomplishments, it will
give me the satisfaction that whatever I do is done with elegance and
poise.
Self-confidence,
wisdom, and grace… these are my three components for “Sexy at
Sixty.” While this may be quite a lofty goal, the good news is that
I have some time to work on these characteristics. Sure, I wouldn’t
mind having some of those traditional “sexy” traits either, but
we all know that those fade with age. What makes up my version
doesn’t… they only becomes better with time.
Blurb
Jenna
Moore's flawlessly orchestrated life and engagement to Ben Kelly,
“the perfect man,” vanish when she discovers a controlling side
of her fiancé. Confused and unsure of who she is without Ben, Jenna
decides to uproot from her safe, predictable life in Boston and move
to Bend, Oregon, hoping to find her answers there. It’s when she
meets Jackson, a former Navy SEAL who battles demons of his own, that
Jenna finds the courage to let go of being perfect and embrace
uncomfortable risks, transforming her life through forgiveness,
compassion, surrender and acceptance. Yet the rewards from
discovering her true self exceed Jenna’s expectations – not only
does she find the greatest love of her life, but she also understands
what’s kept her from learning to bend.
Excerpt
I’m
drawn to a solitary man with shoulder length thick brown hair sitting
alone at a café table. I try not to stare, but I can’t help
myself. When I get closer, I see a faint scar on his cheek. It
intrigues me. He intrigues me. Yet it’s his captivating green eyes
that truly catch my attention. I look in the opposite direction and
make it appear as if I’m about to walk away. But I can’t, he
pulls me toward him. I pause, actually freeze in my tracks before I
find my body shifting in his direction. He’s drinking coffee and
gazing at me. Who is he and why am I feeling this way? Doing my best
to regain some composure, I try to avert my eyes, but they won’t
stop staring at him. What is it? He’s not traditionally handsome –
he’s more of a sensual “bad boy” type – nothing like Ben.
Suddenly, I feel my throat tighten and butterflies appear inside my
stomach. I become conscious about my hair. I’ve had a helmet on all
day. It must look awful.
Stop
it. He’s just some stranger.
Although
he’s sitting, I quickly assess his height and notice his chiseled
muscular build. I’m guessing that he’s older than me, by at least
five or more years. Something deep inside of me begins to stir as I
pass by his table. That’s when I hear, “Place the weight on your
inside toe when you turn. You’re using your knees too much.”
About
the Author
Michelle
Davis, whose career path includes banking, teaching, and college
admissions consulting, holds a B.S. in Finance from Lehigh University
and a M.S. in Education from St. Joseph’s University. Through her
blog, elevate,
Michelle’s goal is to inspire others to shift their perspectives
and welcome change as they realize their life purpose. A Pennsylvania
native, Michelle and her husband enjoy visiting their sons in Boston
and spending time in Bend, Oregon, the settings of her debut novel,
Learning
to Bend.
To learn more about Michelle and how to elevate your life, visit
www.michellemdavis.net.
Facebook
– https://www.facebook.com/LearningtoBend/
Instagram
– https://www.instagram.com/michellemillerdavis/
Amazon
Author Page: https://www.amazon.com/Michelle-Davis/e/B083ZLXBXS/
The
author will be awarding a $50 Amazon or Barnes and Noble GC to one
randomly drawn commenter via Rafflecopter during the tour.
a Rafflecopter giveaway
12 comments:
Thanks for hosting!
Which character do you most relate to from our book? Congrats on the release.
Thanks for hosting me! To answer Bernie's question, I relate most to Jenna, the book's main character, as I also am challenged with perfectionism:)
Hello, Michelle!
I'm delighted to welcome you to Beyond Romance. I love your post - in the second half of my sixties myself, I definitely identify.
Youth was great, but I wouldn't go back to all that angst and self-doubt. It might seem like a cliche, but wisdom DOES come with age.
Hope your tour goes really well!
Yes, life does get better with age:)
Where do you draw the most ideas for books?
Really great post, thanks for sharing!
What's your favorite part about writing?
Good evening, everyone. Most of my ideas just seem to come to me - often when I am running. My favorite part of writing is the rough draft and character creation - I find it the most fun and liberating. Many thanks for hosting me today!!!
What is the hardest part about writing for you?
Your book sounds like a great read and thank you for sharing it with us.
Great guest post
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