By S. Dora (Guest Blogger)
Let me start by thanking
Lisabet for her warm-hearted hospitality. It’s always such a
pleasure to be here.
When I first got the idea
for writing what would become Facing the Truth, a story about
a man discovering BDSM while already in a committed relationship with
another man, the main characters were both in their twenties. Soon
enough I realised something: if I made the age difference
considerable, it would add another, hopefully interesting, layer to
the story.
I’m not just talking
about the simple fact that an university student moves in an
environment that is quite different from that of an office of an
insurance company, or that experience and youth each have their own
brand of power. In this case, it means that a gay man having been a
teenager in the eighties in England very likely doesn’t have quite
the same outlook on sexuality as his lover, who’s eighteen years
younger.
Being gay when Isaac
Newhouse was a teenager meant he wasn’t allowed to have sex with
another boy or man until he was 21. Section 28 stated that a local
authority "shall not intentionally promote homosexuality or
publish material with the intention of promoting homosexuality or
promote the teaching in any maintained school of the acceptability of
homosexuality as a pretended family relationship.” AIDS was
epidemic among gay men. Homophobia wasn’t the hobby of a backwards
minority of people, but was deeply rooted in English society as a
whole.
By the time Tom, the
younger of the two, discovered he was into other boys, attitudes
towards homosexuality were already dramatically changing. There’s
no longer a different age of consent for straight and gay couples and
Section 28 has been moved to its rightful place, the dustbin. While
many individuals and several groups are still homophobic, society as
a whole started to realise that homosexuality is simply a fact of
life and that a legal right like marriage might actually be a good
idea.
By the end of Facing
the Truth, I knew the story wasn’t over yet and so a series
began. Since Calling the Shots is first and foremost a series
about romantic m/m BDSM erotica, the social and political background
is never really mentioned, but it’s in the back of my head while
I’m writing this story. I personally had my first coming-out in
1979, so I know a little about Isaac’s state of mind. That
knowledge influenced how I wrote Isaac’s hesitation to start a
relationship with a much younger (but fully of age) man and his
journey into BDSM and Tom’s “what exactly is the problem?”
attitude.
Part two of Calling the
Shots, The Right Direction, is now available. Here’s a
small excerpt. Isaac and Tom enjoy a weekend full of BDSM fun, in and
out of the bedroom. It’s time for dinner and they ordered pizza.
The following happens:
***
***
Tom
wasn’t out of the kitchen for more than five seconds before the
doorbell rang.
“That’ll
be the pizza,” Tom hollered from the living room. “I’ll get it,
Sir.”
“Use
the groceries wallet. And don’t forget to tip the delivery boy.”
Isaac
thoroughly enjoyed the small details of Tom waiting to take his first
bite until his Dom had given him permission, of his glass being
refilled before he had to ask. It wasn’t until halfway through the
meal that he put his fork down in sudden realisation. “He saw you…”
“Who?
Oh, the guy delivering the pizza,” Tom finally understood.
“Probably a student, just like me.”
“He
saw you.”
“Yeah—he
wasn’t blind. What’s the matter, Sir? Did I do something wrong? I
didn’t flirt or anything—you know I only go for my sexy Master,
because he really knows how to handle both his cane and his cock.”
Tom squirmed on his chair to accentuate his words. “There’s no
way I’ll ever forget who owns me.”
“No,
I
did
something wrong. How could I be this stupid?”
“You’re
scaring me, Isaac… Sir… Please tell me what’s wrong so I can
make it up to you. I’ll accept any punishment, but please explain…”
“Your
collar. He saw you wearing my collar.”
Tom
gaped at him in total incomprehension.
“An
outsider saw you while you were wearing your slave collar.” Why
didn’t Tom understand what he was trying to say? Was
it so hard to understand the possible implications?
“Uh,
he didn’t. He saw a guy of his own age in black sweatpants, a black
shirt, messed up hair and, yes, a collar. To him I probably looked
like a Goth or an emo or perhaps, if he’s a student too, he might
think I’m one of those artistic guys from Arts.” Tom all but
giggled. “If he was one of us, he’d know, no matter what I was
wearing. But he wasn’t one of us.”
“How
can you be so sure?”
“I
would know.”
Silly,
naïve boy.
“Like
you recognise all gay men because you’re one too?” The words hit
like a badly made whip in the hands of a sick sadist. Isaac regretted
them as soon as he had spoken.
“I’m
not saying that…” Tom shrugged. Sadness clouded the happiness in
his eyes. “You’re ashamed of us and of what we’re doing. Being
Dom and sub isn’t our sweet little secret—it’s our dirty big
secret.”
“No.”
Was
it really no,
and not perhaps
a little bit,
or somewhat,
or
even…yes?
“Tommy…”
What
was he supposed to say? Hadn’t his panic spoken more truth than any
of the excuses and explanations he’d been planning to use?
2 comments:
And it's always a pleasure to have you as my guest!
You're so right about the differences in assumptions and emotions between generations. I'm grateful that young men and women today grow up somewhat more accepting of the variety in sexual orientations. Still, we have a ways to go...
Good luck with THE RIGHT DIRECTION!
Always good to be here!
It's positive the younger generation lives in a world that has changed its ideas about homosexuality so much (even if we have still a long way to go), but I hope they stay awake and alert. Safety is not a given for us, I'm afraid.
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